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Our heroes are no longer trapped in time and the time vortex has been vanquished, thanks to Hyper Pri-Actually, who cares about that? Here's the next part of the adventure!
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The Evil Saga! ~ Chapter 18: The One With The Penis Forest Jokes
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The Drufle:
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Last time, on Pathfinder.
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The Drufle:
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...Nothing much really happened.
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The Drufle:
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We pulled more cards!
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The Drufle:
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That's always fun.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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i was here the whole time
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Seishi Honekawa:
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hmm yes
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Seishi Honekawa:
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there was no time abyss
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Seishi Honekawa:
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no sir
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The Drufle:
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Oh, of course.
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The Drufle:
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Ezra's dojo also got nice and built.
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The Drufle:
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It looks quite good!
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Ezra:
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but it always looked like that of
course
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The Drufle:
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Well, clearly.
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The Drufle:
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Anyway, the party has arrived at what
appears to be a small village!
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The Drufle:
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It's quite comfy-looking.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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"This appears to be a small village!"
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The Drufle:
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There are five buildings that you can
see around here.
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The Drufle:
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The one immediately south of the party
appears to be a blacksmith.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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"There are five buildings I can see
around here"
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Seishi Honekawa:
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how can we tell
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Ezra:
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its got the sign
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The Drufle:
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There's an anvil outside.
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The Drufle:
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And a furnace.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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let's steal that anvil
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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I take ten on my Knowledge (Local)
check.
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The Drufle:
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What's your modifier?
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Seishi Honekawa:
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man should use an anvil as a weapon too
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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+5, according to this sheet. Which
can't be right at all.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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That's my INT mod.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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ranks
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The Drufle:
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Well no, don't pay attention to the
ingame sheets.
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The Drufle:
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Those are pretty horribly wrong.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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because everyone is terrible at
updating
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The Drufle:
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I'm going to probably fix those up
after this session if I don't fall asleep.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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u guise
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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+6
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Ezra:
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Maybe I can use Diplomacy to gather
info.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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im gona use fly
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The Drufle:
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There are no people in sight at the
moment.
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Ezra:
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Let's look at these buildings then
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Seishi Honekawa:
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lets do a montage
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Ezra:
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anything stand out??
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Seishi Honekawa:
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exploration music!
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Seishi Honekawa:
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Perception Check
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At-Will • Wis
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Perception + WisBonus = 8 + 2 + 3 = 13 »
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The Drufle:
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Well, the building at the far west is
noticeably different.
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* Ezra rolls: 1d20+7 => 15 + 7 = 22
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Seishi Honekawa:
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the long one or the longer one
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The Drufle:
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It's made out of a different stone,
and actually looks pretty shoddy.
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The Drufle:
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The northwestern one.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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Perception Check!
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* Brass rolls: 1d20+13 => 13 + 13 = 26
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Seishi Honekawa:
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13!
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Seishi Honekawa:
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how
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Seishi Honekawa:
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double 13's
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Seishi Honekawa:
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thats like
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Seishi Honekawa:
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super bad luck
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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Death-Death
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The Drufle:
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You see that, in fact, only two of
these buildings seem the same build.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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Eyes of Death
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The Drufle:
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The northern thin one and the
blacksmith, to be precise.
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The Drufle:
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The three more western ones are all
different things.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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"Them thar buildings are themthar
different."
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Ezra:
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"Well, yes, of course."
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Ezra:
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"I guess this one here was built
first. Perhaps the mayor lives here."
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Ezra:
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"The mayor of five buildings."
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The Drufle:
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Well, you aren't quite sure if it was
built first.
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Ezra:
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what are these two like
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The Drufle:
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It just happens to look pretty poorly
made.
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Ezra:
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at hte bottom left
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The Drufle:
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The southwestern one, in contrast,
looks pristine.
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The Drufle:
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It's made of what appears to be
marble, and polished smooth.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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I renew my detection of Deathwatch and
Detect Hostile Intent (when that ends)
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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Why not.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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let's mark em
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The Drufle:
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The southern middle one is made of
white stone as well, but not nearly as clean.
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Ezra:
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"What are we doing here, again?"
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The Drufle:
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Excellent question!
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The Drufle:
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I believe Hina was quite hurt.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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"Let's look for artifacts."
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Ezra:
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maybe we can find a place to rest
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Seishi Honekawa:
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"Then we go."
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Satonakaja has connected.
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The Drufle:
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Well, you'd have to actually bother
the townsfolk to find anything.
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The Drufle:
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Nobody seems to be out at the moment.
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Ezra:
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Well, it would be awfully rude to
barge into someone's home, so maybe we should try the blacksmith's.
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Satonakaja:
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iit sure is green
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Ezra:
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i might be evil but i have -manners-
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Seishi Honekawa:
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this is an rpg
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Seishi Honekawa:
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all village doors are unlocked
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The Drufle:
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Antagonists don't care about knocking,
silly.
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Ezra:
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fine you do it
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Seishi Honekawa:
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protagonists too
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Ezra:
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you're the least terrible looking at
hte moment
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Hina Takahashi:
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what is even happening
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Ezra:
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hina's covered in blood and stuff
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Seishi Honekawa:
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caw
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Ezra:
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remember the giant worm
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Hina Takahashi:
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yes
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Seishi Honekawa:
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centpided
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Ezra:
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we've just gotten to town now
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The Drufle:
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Yeah, remember how you almost died?
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Ezra:
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nothing happened last week
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The Drufle:
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I'm not entirely sure why Hina is back
to full health.
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The Drufle:
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Oh, right, you gave her a potion.
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Ezra:
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she isn't
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* Bernard Blackbrass approaches the
Blacksmith's door.
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Ezra:
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26/51 it says
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The Drufle:
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Oh, her health bar is glitching then.
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The Drufle:
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So will the party knock on any doors?
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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The one i've approached.
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Ezra:
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Let's go to the blacksmiths
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The Drufle:
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Alright, very well.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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why are the buildings the void
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Seishi Honekawa:
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im gonna go in this one
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The Drufle:
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So you can't see inside them.
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* Bernard Blackbrass turns to both Ezra and
Hina.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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-We should back up.-
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The Drufle:
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"One moment!"
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The Drufle:
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You hear yelled from inside.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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How the hell do you all go in
different directions?
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The Drufle:
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Who even knows.
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Ezra:
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well you didn't say
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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I think Seishi even went /forward/!
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Ted:
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"Yes?"
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Seishi Honekawa:
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where the heck are the ladies
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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"Good day."
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Seishi Honekawa:
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do these dudes just bud off each other
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Seishi Honekawa:
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like sponges
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Ezra:
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lets diplomacy the heck out of this guy
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Seishi Honekawa:
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i *knew* they werent human
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Ezra:
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maybe it is a lady
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The Drufle:
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The ladies don't come out to the
frontier, Seishi.
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The Drufle:
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You should know that.
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Ezra:
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maybe yoou're being super rude
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Seishi Honekawa:
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im
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Seishi Honekawa:
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im so sorry
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Ted:
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"Good day to you as well, sir."
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Seishi Honekawa:
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ted
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Ted:
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"Are you here to trade?"
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Ted:
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"Buy?"
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Seishi Honekawa:
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-What's happening-
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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"I'll see your wares."
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Seishi Honekawa:
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-What's he saying-
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Ted:
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"Of course, one moment please."
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* Ted walks back into the building.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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-We're trading. Need anything?-
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Ezra:
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-I'd like some daggers.-
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Hina Takahashi:
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we have lots of dosh if I remember
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Hina Takahashi:
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ezra did you ever get your gold plated
wakizashi
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Seishi Honekawa:
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-Maybe some silver...-
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Ezra:
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not yet but i got a cool bow
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* Ted shortly returns with what appear to be a
saber, a fencing foil, a long blade-tipped spear, and a few daggers.
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Ezra:
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its taller than me
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Seishi Honekawa:
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they're in a golf tube thing
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Ezra:
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It's like he heard what I was thinking!
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Hina Takahashi:
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hey wait
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Hina Takahashi:
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is that
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Hina Takahashi:
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a naginata
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Ted:
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"This is a few of the things I've got
at the moment."
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Ted:
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"The rest ain't finished quite yet."
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Hina Takahashi:
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or a lame glaive
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The Drufle:
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It is, in fact, a naginata.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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"I don't suppose you do touch-ups?"
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The Drufle:
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Not a particularly wonderful one, but
it seems to be made of good-quality steel.
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Hina Takahashi:
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hey hina has a weapon experience for
naginata
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Ted:
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"Touch-ups?"
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Ted:
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"How so?"
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Seishi Honekawa:
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-More mundane objects...-
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Ezra:
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get targus resmelted
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Ezra:
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oh the pain
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Hina Takahashi:
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"May I inspect the polearm, sir?"
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Seishi Honekawa:
|
turn him into a golem
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Ted:
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"Of course ma'am, here."
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* Ted hands the naginata to Hina.
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Ezra:
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"I'd like to inquire about the
daggers."
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Ezra:
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very formal
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Ezra:
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im wearing a tie
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Ted:
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"Of course."
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Ted:
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"These two are simple iron daggers,
nothing special. They get the job done, though."
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Ted:
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"This here is a dagger I had enchanted
by the mage here."
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Hina Takahashi:
|
Hina looks over the naginata, trying
to get a feel for it.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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"Yeah! That's it. Enchantments."
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Ted:
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"I think he said it's some kind of
magic."
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Ted:
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"Don't remember what, really."
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Ted:
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"And this one..."
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* Ted pulls a dagger out of a back pocket.
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Seishi Honekawa:
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-Hmmm-
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Hina Takahashi:
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"Much like one from my homeland. . .
how much are you charging for this?"
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Ted:
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"This dagger is made of I don't even
know."
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Seishi Honekawa:
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"There's a mage here?"
|
* Ted turns to Hina.
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Ezra:
|
"Hmm..."
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Ted:
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"I'm asking 300 gold for that weapon,
ma'am."
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* Ezra rolls: 1d20+6 => 11 + 6 = 17
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Ezra:
|
Appraise the weird dagger
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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Detect Psionics on the weird dagger.
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The Drufle:
|
Unlike the other daggers, this one has
a curved blade and is made of a metal you don't think you've seen
before.
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The Drufle:
|
The edge is masterfully serrated, and
it looks like it could slice steel without pause.
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Ted:
|
"Yes, we have a mage here."
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Ted:
|
"He's the one two houses over, behind
the mystic's home."
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Hina Takahashi:
|
jesus HOW much
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Hina Takahashi:
|
oh wait I have 1000 lololol
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The Drufle:
|
Streak paid more than that for his bow.
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The Drufle:
|
300 is quite a bargain.
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Ezra:
|
i stole veilwars money
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Seishi Honekawa:
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Spell
|
what wait i think i did it wrong
|
h cra
Targets: An Enemy
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Seishi Honekawa:
|
yep i did it wrong
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Ezra:
|
How much are these daggers then
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Bernard Blackbrass:
|
...
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The Drufle:
|
The iron ones are 50 gp each, the
enchanted one is 250gp, and he hasn't actually put a price on the
weird dagger yet.
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The Drufle:
|
He hasn't had it officially appraised
yet.
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Ezra:
|
Hmm.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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"Hm well...
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Hina Takahashi:
|
how do you quick draw a naginata
|
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Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(What color is the metal?)
|
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Ezra:
|
quickly
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The Drufle:
|
Well, that's an odd question.
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Bernard Blackbrass:
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-Do any of you recognize this metal?-
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Bernard Blackbrass:
|
What. Color.
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The Drufle:
|
The metal seems to be black, but it
shines blue.
|
Golurk is disconnected.
|
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Ezra:
|
Maybe it's octarine
|
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The Drufle:
|
As in, the light reflecting seems to
be blue despite it clearly being black.
|
Golurk_ has connected.
|
The Drufle:
|
Your brain hurts looking at the
dagger, really.
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|
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Ezra:
|
just like those rich cars
|
Golurk_ is disconnected.
Golurk has connected.
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Seishi Honekawa:
|
there
|
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|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"Well, I'll take it, sir. It'll feel
more nautral for me than this lance, at the very least. Three
hundred it is."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
detect magic
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Spellcraft Check
|
At-Will • Int
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Spellcraft + IntBonus = 16 + 7 + 1 = 24 »
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|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
|
Knowledge (Psionics) Check
|
At-Will • IntBonus
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ MiscSkill2 = 13 + 9 = 22 »
|
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
can those psionics things even work on
regular magic
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Did you craft this dagger yourself?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Somewhat.
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Excellent! Thank you for your trade."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
If there are equivalencies, i'll see
those.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
WEAPONS
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Ted:
|
"Oh no, me? I don't even know what
this dagger is."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Well, then.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(I should bluff this guy.)
|
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The Drufle:
|
Seishi: the magic on this dagger seems
to be offensive in nature, but you aren't quite sure what.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
First manifest Conceal Thoughts.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
wow!
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"So someone sold it to you?"
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It seems to be element-based.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
dont buy that dagger
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
it might say bad words at you
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Yes, it was sold to me last week."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass looks a bit worried about
the dagger.
|
|
Ezra:
|
'hey, nice hooters' shouts the dagger,
for the 19th time that day
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"They only asked 10 gold for it, and I
couldn't really turn that down."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"You know some daggers have terrifying
magic."
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"That's what the mage says, but he's
nuts so it doesn't matter much."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
hey what did i tell you, dagger. we
dont say those things toward half-orcs
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
Drufle: so this is a normal naginata
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
apologize at once
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Well, best not wield it yourself, at
least."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
yay
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"I think that thing might be cursed."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Nothing special, really.
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Cursed? I've been handling this thing
all week."
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"If it was cursed something would've
happened by now."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Yes."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Yes, but have you tried putting it
away from you?"
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Well of course I have, I just
retrieved it from the chest with the rest of the daggers."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Swing it at me."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"I'd like to purchase the enchanted
and the regular daggers."
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Of course, that'll be 350 gp for all
three."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Right then.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
so guys
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"And as for you, sir, I don't like
testing my weapons against potential customers."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
hina has a weapon with a x4 crit
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Tends to be bad for business."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"It's... a family tradition."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We Tieflings tend to test things on
each other. Upbringing and all."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"With... permission, more or less."
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Well, if you insist, I suppose."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Ted grips the dagger and takes a swing
at Brass, making sure not to actually hit him.
|
* Bernard Blackbrass just readjusts his mask,
not moving.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
|
Spellcraft Check
|
At-Will • Int
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Spellcraft + IntBonus = 10 + 4 + 5 = 19 »
|
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"There, is that good?"
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Whatever magic there is, he clearly
hasn't activated it yet.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Actually, i'm at 11
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
but that's useful.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Poke me."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass nods sagely.
* Ted shrugs.
* Ted pokes Brass with the dagger.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
|
Fortitutde Save
|
|
Fortitude Roll: « d20
+ Fortitude = 10 + 3 = 13 »
|
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Is that your actual save?
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
+4
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Well, you're fine then..
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Nnngh."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The dagger blinks as it touches you.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Ted jumps back in surprise.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
BLINK DAGGER
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
WHAT IS THIS, DOTA
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Oh, I'm sorry! Did I hurt you?"
|
* Bernard Blackbrass nods.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Nah."
|
* Ted looks at the dagger in his hand.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"I am tougher than most."
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"I'm going to show this to the mage,
one moment please."
|
* Ted pushes the others out of the way and
rushes to the mage's home.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Oh we can do that."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Wait."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-...crap.-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
im back"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Let's follow."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Ezra, follow him now!-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Who's their mage???"
|
* Bernard Blackbrass peeks inside the house.
|
|
Ezra:
|
I follow him then
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
As does Hina.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Perception Check
|
At-Will • Wis
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Perception + WisBonus = 4 + 2 + 3 = 9 »
|
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I am there in spirit.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Ted has already entered the house
ahead of the party, and you can hear sound from inside.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I mean Ted's house.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Which I haven't left.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
>
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Is the party going to wait for him to
come back out?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Spell
|
test
|
tstets
Targets: tets
Roll: tet
|
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
>
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
this is terrible
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
*crap*
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Can we hear what's being said?
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You aren't even sure that you hear
voices.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Detect Psionics on /everything/ inside.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
you're too far
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Im gonna use this cup"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
against the wall
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i have a mess kit
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
it probably has a cup
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Why did you move me?
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I was checking the guy's house.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
and eavesdrop
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Or at least leaving my psicrystal to
spy on stuff.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Perception Check
|
At-Will • Wis
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Perception + WisBonus = 10 + 2 + 3 = 15 »
|
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Yeah that's a good idea.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
speaking of which does it have a pog
yet
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Seishi: you think you hear voices.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Oh, pog, right.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
if you've got an image i'll make it
into one
|
|
The Drufle:
|
I fixed tokentool by the way.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Actually I can send the psicrystal
with the others.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's fine now.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
That's a great idea.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
oh, ok
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
*to Ezra* "You try."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
I forget if Sneaky sent me a picture
or not.
|
* Ezra rolls: 1d20+7 => 6 + 7 = 13
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I did.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
But i'm not sure if I like it now.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
we can change it later
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Ezra also doesn't understand the
voices.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
But you are certain there are voices
now.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Hmm, we'll just wait."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Ted suddenly opens the door, with the
mage behind him.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
What's in this guy's house?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
-Brass, he's returning.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-All right little guy. Scan this guy's
house, sneak out.-
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"So, Tork thinks that this dagger here
is some kind of draining thing."
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Is that right Tork?"
|
* Tork the Enchanter nods.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
tork lies
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
tork looks like a carboard cutout
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
thats why he/she cant talk
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
canon
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Tork is one of the default pogs.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Because I didn't have time to go
looking for pictures.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's appropriate either way.
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"So, he says I should ask a bunch of
money for this thing."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
hah
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I'm not actually that interested in it
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"He says no less than 1000 gp, which
personally I think is a bit high."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"Well that's one way to make profit."
|
|
|
Ted:
|
"Why is it so expensive Tork?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Mr. Tork! Do you have any magical
equipment for sale?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Someone else could buy it if they want
though
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Greeeeaaaat.-
|
* Tork the Enchanter whispers into Ted's ear.
|
|
Ted:
|
"Tork you know that magical
mumbo-jumbo don't mean anything to me."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
is tork a ventriloquist's dummy
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
is *ted* the dummy??
|
* Tork the Enchanter sighs and shakes his head.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
dun dun duuun
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
kay little fellow. What do you see inside here? Use your super
senses.=
|
* Tork the Enchanter looks at Seishi and
motions for her to come inside.
|
|
Ted:
|
"Oh, don't mind Tork. He's just shy
around new people."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass takes a long way around
town.
|
|
Ted:
|
"Awfully quiet."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
where
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
hi
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Inside you see a variety of potions
and materials.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Along with a few staves along the east
wall.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Other than that, nothing much.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Interesting looking staves..."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Potions too..."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"What are they?"
|
* Tork the Enchanter nods.
* Tork the Enchanter mumbles a bit, and then
speaks up.
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"The um... potions are healing and
um... strength potions."
|
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"The staffs are uh... magical foci."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
we've got tons of healing potions
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
look at the other ones
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Magical foci?"
|
* Tork the Enchanter nods.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Is that fancy talk for sticks that
dont really do things"
|
* Tork the Enchanter shakes his head.
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"They... they bolster spells, you see."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
(oh they're metamagic rods)
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
(scooooore)
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
staff of bigger explosions
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
how many are there
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"What does each of them do?"
|
Seishi Honekawa: (( now i realize why some
gaming groups just skip shopping roleplaying ))
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"Well... um... the black gemmed one
makes offensive spells do... uh... more damage."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
how obscene
|
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"And the birch one... uh... makes
people heal better."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Interesting!"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
mfw i cant buy any of these
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
you can steal my money since i took
all of veilwars
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
heheh
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
you should take tektons money
|
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"They are... um... 600 each or 1000
for both."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
does he have money
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
dang sick deals
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oh are there only two
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i am in despair
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Well, these staffs are quite difficult
to make.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Given time, he can make more.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
you should go for big booms, in my
expert opinion
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"I'll take both"
|
* Tork the Enchanter smiles.
|
|
Ezra:
|
man merchanting is a piece of piss
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
*cough cough*
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Do you take platinum?"
|
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"Of course, yes..."
|
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"100 platinum, then."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"100 platinums it is"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
didn't you start out loaded
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
see if i were true evil i would
scatter them all over the floor
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
good thing im neutral
|
|
|
Tork the Enchanter:
|
"Thank you, yes."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Chaotic Mild Inconvienence
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Right, what now?
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Is the party stocked on stuff?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
maybe we could find out about the town
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
...did I learn anything or what. -.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I've been spying on these houses.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
or just piss off to the dick land
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
just roll
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Well, the northern house is a
carpenter.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
with a big bonerus
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
...great.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
And the house to the west is some sort
of combat hall or such.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
retsu train
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The house to the south is too
magically guarded to get much from.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
you could ask tork about the place
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
or you know dickland
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i forget the actual name
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
dickland
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Oedipia, silly.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
Dicktown
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's your main goal at the moment, how
do you keep forgetting that.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i forget whats the place and whats the
wizard
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i thought our goal was killing 1
million puppies
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
have you been killing puppies
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
what are you up to
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
relatively
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Bad Seishi, bad.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
drufle were those actual metamagic rods
|
|
The Drufle:
|
And yes, you are looking for Freudicon
in Oedipia.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Well, sort of.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
there's nothing here that boosts
healing at all
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The black staff gives an extra +2
damage per level of spell to offensive spells.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
And the white staff does the same, but
with healing.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
I.e., a 6th-level healing spell would
heal an extra 12 hp.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
And inside the blacksmith?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
organs
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
not again
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The blacksmith has lots of weapons.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Really, all of them have some money.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Because, you know, trading town.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I don't need to steal his money.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
But what metals?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
uranium
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Mostly iron and steel.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Nothing too amazing.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
come to think of it should i sell my
regular old wakizashi
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
are we stealing stuff
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
being evil for once
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
sure why not. -_-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
well you people have no business
stealing anything with those stealth rolls
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Or, we could just gather information.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
hina goes clank clank clank clank
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Now let's check out no-peek house.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Why is Hina always the one to suggest
going full evil?
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Is this going to be a continuous thing?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
what kind of ninja high school did you
go to
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
its not hina its her mind controller
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Of course, of course.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Break it down."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Right, this house.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Hey Hina! Put your arms around my
waist. Like we're a couple."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You can't really tell what's up with
this house.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
armor clad samurai being cute okay then
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
she has 17 weapons
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
but a katana aint one
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
lets buy her one then
|
* Bernard Blackbrass wiggles his toes.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
lets go back to the blacksmith and
spend another hour buying things
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You hear someone from inside yelling.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-C'mere Hina.-
|
|
The Drufle:
|
"Could you all please step away from
the door?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Is someone getting murdered?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
wheres the door
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
im at least 10 ft away
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(the psicrystal is on the door)
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The door opens by itself.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
that is not english
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"So are we being invited inside?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Hello!"
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Yes, please, come in."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Or at least get away from the door."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"You're quite a rowdy folk."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Oh, thank you."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Ah, a tiefling."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Not many of you around here, are you."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"Er, yes. Thank you indeed."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"We're not too common, these days."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
is everyone else comign in
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"No, most of you seem to be down in
Tungli."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"So, what brings you here, hm?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"You seem too experienced to be here
just for the goods."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Oh, just adventuring is all."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We're escaped exiles from Malor."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
oh
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
um
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
oh
|
* Bernard Blackbrass chortles.
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Ah, figures."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Can't get any good people around here
these days."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We're just passing through, no worry."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Did you tell the others that?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Who are you?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"But... let's not shake hands" with a
level gaze. "I'm not joking on /that/ one."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"My name is Ta'lae, tengu woman."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Don't get a lot of you in Cosma
either."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Odd group, you are."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"You mean Tieflings?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Two tieflings, a human, and a tengu."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Sadly, Tieflings are not really
tolerated, i've found."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Well, you are the spawn of the most
horrid of beasts."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Not many people are too fond of that."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"I can't control that."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"I never said you could."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass nods mournfully.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
that's not a caw caw at all
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
drufle use my old pog
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Do you know of Malor?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"You seem oddly knowledgeable. I don't
know why."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Neither do I."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
does that work
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Malor is something many of my kind
are interested in."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Truly interesting, it is.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
wait
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
what
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Golurk, did you just change my pog.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Is she a PC?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oh uh
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
poop butt did i misread a thing
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oh she's not a tengu she was talking
to me
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
ahahahaha
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Can you change it back?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
yes we have a title now
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"It has a strange population."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Or should I just put a new pog in?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"That session where golurk thinks an
npc is a bird"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Mostly rocky people, sentient sand
and mud."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Honestly, I could tell you a lot, if
you had the time for idle chitchat."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Oh, I have more time than I know what
to do with."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"However, I doubt you could tell me
much new."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"If you survived Malor, I'm sure you
already know what there is to know."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"Do not forget the lava. Always the
lava. Or sand storms. Or burning earth."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
-Should we mention Majri?-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"And the fire lord."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Yes, Malor has quite an affinity for
the flame and earth."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Ah, did you meet him? Bit of a dick,
I hear."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-We'll build up to it.-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
-Uh, never mind.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
erm
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Oh, just the biggest."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
they have the word dick in this world
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
truly the best world
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Well duh
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
except for the malor aprt
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
men have dicks Golurk
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
they have an island of dicks
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
ducks
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Good, good. You must be quite the
party!"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i miss jikai
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i miss tekton
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Meeting ol' Majri and surviving, I am
impressed."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"And... we have this mask."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
No I do not show her, I am wearing it.
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Mask? Really?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
he's wearing that creepy mask
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
all the time
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"What kind of mask?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
is she the air suli
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
why do people even talk to him
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
she looks like the air suli
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I have no idea!
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I never took it off!
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I was face to face with that
blacksmith!
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
wat
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
maybe he thought that was your face
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
maybe its your handsomeness
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Yeah, but they see weird things all
the time.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
I mean, it's just a black mask with
little runes on it.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
there's a giant centipede outside
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
for once id like a village that will
freak out in our presence
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
were not evil enough
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
holy shit does that guy have a bird
head
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You're on the wrong continent for that.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Yeah I stole a bunch of stuff from
that guy and got away with it."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Pardon, you stole that mask from
Majri?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Oh no, not the mask. That was a deal
gone sour."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"...this story sounds kind of strange."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Well, I imagine so."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"We didn't steal anything, really"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"He'd already attacked us, to be fair."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"How do I put it. We /tried/ to let
him take it. It didn't like him either."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Didn't it?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"That's weird. Mind if I take a look?"
|
* Bernard Blackbrass flicks it right off and
palms it. "Don't put it on, all right?"
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
suddenly its majri
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
dun dun duuuun
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
million stabs
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
tpk
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Of course, I don't want to mess with
too much."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
no way man i got stabs
|
* Ta'lae reaches over and takes the mask from
Brass' hand.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"It's chipped, and we gotta fix it."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Or Else."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i dont have any zombies on me at all
im useless right now
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Wow, this really is unusual."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"What's with all the elemental runes?"
|
* Ta'lae flips the mask over and over between
her hands, puzzled.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"*You* tell us"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"I recognize a bit of Ignan."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Could I determine her race, somehow
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Good, I don't speak a word of Ignan."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Specifically if she's a Suli.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Tengu, bro.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
hey
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
no profiling
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Oh, she is quite clearly a Suli.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
oh.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
okay.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Her hair looks more like air than
actual keratin, and she's hovering above the ground.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
is majri famous for sulis or something
|
* Bernard Blackbrass relaxes a bit, ironic in
that he's lost DR/Epic.
|
|
Ezra:
|
oh the hovering, thats a total giveaway
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"It makes me uneasy, and yet..."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"...I feel like i'm the only one who
has any business wearing it."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Nah, I bet anyone could pull this
thing off."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"You just look better in it."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass smirks. "Flatterer."
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
FASHION POLICE
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
masks shaped for human-ish faces are
oppressive
|
* Seishi Honekawa has a bird head
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
You chickenhead
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Really though, all this Auran just
talks about some sort of gem."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"What about?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Not much, really."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"It talks about a group of powerful
gems that are supposed to be with this mask."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
do you know how terrible it is that
the only mask i can wear is a plague doctor's mask
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"And the Ignan bits mention..."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(May as well recite what.)
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
we must bring the 5 elements together
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
to save the planet
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
come to think of it can i even wear
masks
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
instead of heart
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
they have
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i have an owl for a head
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
penis
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The Ignan bits say, specifically, "The
stones of the gods shall be reborn and renew the power of the
planes."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
no you have people head with owl
features
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
no i have an entire owl
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
the whole thing
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
really
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
wow
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Seriously, this mask is kinda
freaking me out."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
freak
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Where did you get this from again?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i like how the air suli talks like a
high school cheerleader
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"I'm afraid to tell you."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Fair enough."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass leans in.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
dont make out
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
not now
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
you weirdo freaks
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"What uh, what do you want?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
birds can't make out
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
mwah
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"For you to open your mind."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Kid, what does that even mean?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"I'm a mystic, my mind is nothing but
open."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass blinks.
* Bernard Blackbrass tries adding Ta'lae.
|
|
Ezra:
|
you're trying to collective her?
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Yes.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
to what end!
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
this is madNESS
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
mind orgies
|
|
The Drufle:
|
She joins the collective.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
this is terrible, jsut not what i
expected at all
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i came here for plot
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
we can just talk like normal people!
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
talking is a free action
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Welcome.-
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
waat
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
this conversation literally laster for
0 seconds
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
d
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Ok, why exactly do you need this?-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-I mean, I am standing right in front
of you.-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
see look
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-It's something I don't fully
understand myself.-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Are you going to give us anything?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-No one growing up can tell me how,
but I just know how to contact people.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Give you? What do you want?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Loot?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Wisdom?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"If you want loot, go to one of the
shops."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Sweet dosh?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Ignore her. She's kind of greedy.-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"...drugs"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-And uh, do put my mask on.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Eh, I'd rather not.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-I mean on me.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Er, what?-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Do you have any idea where the gems
are at?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Just want it back is all.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Oh, right.-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Erm, so, Ta'lae, how do you know
Majri?"
|
* Ta'lae sets the mask back on Brass' face.
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Oh, he's just a relative. Nothing
special, really."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Hm. So it can be touched by his
family just fine.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Just not him.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"And no, cleric, I don't know where
the gems are."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"What are you doing in this village?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Being bored, mostly."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Perception Check
|
At-Will • Wis
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Perception + WisBonus = 1 + 2 + 3 = 6 »
|
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
looking at room
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
house
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
thingy
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Wonder if she knows Freudicon
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Can we get you anything?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"And... do you have any idea about the
Lord's Jewels?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
we must find the avatar
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Me? I doubt you have anything I could
use."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
to bring balance to the world
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
the avatar is... freudicon
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Eh, I bet someone else who knew Majri
would know."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Or Arali, for that matter."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Probably not Keltor, though. He's
kind of a loner."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"I've been sitting here in these woods
too long to really know anything."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We'd appreciate it if you told us
where to find Keltor."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"If you know, ma'am."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"What, Keltor? Why?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Actually, do you know about
Freudicon?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-I'm not sure whether to tell her
whether or not Arali may be in danger.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(Of course, it's said as if she might
not be in the Collective. As if by accident.)
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(Ezra as 'target'.)
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Oh good gods, what do you want
Freudicon for?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Well, he knew Majri..."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"He might know about these jewels."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Well, yeah, of course he would."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Still, Freudicon? He's kind of crazy."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
penis knows about jewels
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
of COURSE
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
they're probably right under him
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"We've not really got much choice,
sadly."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"How crazy is he, exactly?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"We've never really heard anything
specific."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Well, he wouldn't kill you, I guess."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"But he has some, eccentricities."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"Just torture you till you go mad?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Nah, he isn't violent."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Just exceptionally unusual."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
of course
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
we already know what he does
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
*shudder*
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
if we save the world we'll be totes
heroes
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
making it much much easier to
subjugate the world
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"You guys are gonna go see him anyway,
aren't you."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We have no choice."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We... don't know how to tell you
this."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Here. Please.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-We... think Majri may have went after
Arali.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(actually, belay that one for now.)
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-How are you and Arali related?-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Uh... Not entirely sure how to answer
that.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-I mean, Suli relations aren't really
like normal relations, what with the whole djinni thing.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-I guess we're like, cousins? I guess?-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
are you the imouto of the family
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
my imouto can't possibly be this cute
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-We last saw Majri lose it. He
mentioned something about seeing Arali, and sounded visibly upset.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Yeah, figures he'd do something like
that.-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Why'd she send us there anyway
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-He... teleported away. We haven't
been able to contact Arali.-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
your vocal cords are gonna atrophy if
you keep brain talking like that
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Not the most stable one, him.-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
-Nah, I bet she's fine. She's a hardy
one.-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
she beats him at elemental
rock-paper-scissors
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Anyway, do you want anything else?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Sweet loots"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Look, I don't have anything to give
you. That's what the marketers are for."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Did you know there's giant centipedes
outside, by the way."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Just so you know."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"One more thing."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Ezra, show her the book.-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Sure.
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Yeah, centipedes are a thing."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Ooh, a book!"
|
* Bernard Blackbrass pulls out his massive
axe, leaning on it upside-down.
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"What is it?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Arali's method of contact."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Can you use it?"
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Oh, I forgot she used these things.
Kind of archaic, but whatever."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Well anyone can use it, you just
write in it."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Would you contact us?"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"However you do it."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Well, I don't really like talking to
people if they're far away, but I could send some wind to you if I
felt like it."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Oh, can I ask you somethign else? Do
you know why Malor is so unstable?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Majri seemed to think he was partly
responsible."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"I bet he does, he thinks everything
is about him."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"I bet it's just some pissed off
elementals or someone from the outer planes getting too close to
the material plane."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We have a lot of questions. But I
understand if we are troubling you."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We'll be back later, perhaps."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Or at least, I will."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Great, great."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I hand her some chalk.
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Nice speaking to you not-so-crazy
people."
|
* Ta'lae looks confused, but accepts the gift.
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"Just mostly, hm?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
you didn't think i'd forget did you
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Mostly, yeah."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Also hi, I almost forgot you were
there."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
After handing her the chalk I begin to
leave.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Have a candle too>"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Call me Brass.-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"I was Ezra."
|
* Seishi Honekawa drops a candle.
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Hey, free stuff! Nice."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Now if you don't mind, I believe I
have some thinking to do."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"As do I."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass twirls his axe a bit,
despite its great weight.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Tell me about any dead bodies you
find."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Name?-
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Dead bodies, sure."
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"What, my name? I told you my name,
like, twenty minutes ago."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
(what, augh)
|
|
|
Ta'lae:
|
"Shoo, stop being silly."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
lets go penis
|
* Bernard Blackbrass turns on his heel,
gracefully ambling out with perfect balance.
|
The Drufle:
|
The door slams shut behind him.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
its funny because conversations in
media never have silly misunderstandings
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
but it'll still happen here because
we're real
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
fake real
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
people
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
lets go to world 3, dickland
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
this mario is weird
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Such a strange game indeed!
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, would you like to head back to the
temple?
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
We just might.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I have no objections to that.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We're not much closer to learning
about this mask."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"I'm glad to learn Arali can likely
handle Majri, though."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"I would hate to see someone who
helped us hurt. . ."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass mouths a silent mocking
with his tongue.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"What happens happens."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We must remain vigilant."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
should we buy food or something
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
we did get pancakes i guess
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You still have food from Phil!
|
|
The Drufle:
|
That will last you a few days.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
a years worth of pancakes
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Hey. Targus."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
wasn't the zombie carrying those
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"What uh.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"What's this Xarn guy you mentioned?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"So, Seishi, that centipede is still
in my dojo."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Do we have a plan for that thing?"
|
|
Targus:
|
"Oh, Xarn?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"tomorrow
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"
|
|
|
Targus:
|
"He was just from an old legend."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Could we keep it zombified and in the
realm?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"It seems a little large to take into
a dungeon."
|
|
|
Targus:
|
"Something about getting banished from
the planes, and then came thus to here, and then I don't really
remember after that."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"It can dig underground."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"But yes perhaps"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Or maybe a guardian for our airship."
|
|
|
Targus:
|
"Not a particularly interesting story,
really."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We need a library."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Man. I know a little about a lot."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
need to research writing first
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
invent books
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Quick, build the great library!
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
fuck that let's create the internet
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
|
Craft Check
|
At-Will • Int
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Craft + IntBonus = 7 + 0 + 2 = 9 »
|
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Then you can get philosophy as a free
tech.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
skip books
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
aid another
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Craft Check
|
At-Will • Int
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Craft + IntBonus = 4 + 0 + 1 = 5 »
|
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Yeah, you aren't crafting anything for
a while.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Anyway, are you heading back to the
temple now to fly to Oedipia? Or something else?
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
(man if anyone plays civ 5 here I
could someday get together a superhugeridiculousgame)
|
* Bernard Blackbrass mutters to no one
repeatedly "No oneknows anything, no one knows anything..."
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
I support flying to penisland
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"We just... check these houses..."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Yeah."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
(i really want to play but i can't run
it right now)
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Satona: I've played 3 singleplayer
games in the past week.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
you cant run anything
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I support flying away forever
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
(i have like three other Civ 5 players)
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
not even terraria
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
let's go penis
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i suffer so
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, flying to Oedipia?
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
yes
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
PENISLAND
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
pppppppenis
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
maybe I'll know what's going on at
that point
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
maybe it wont be as bad as we think
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
just a few small penises
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
not worthy of a dick pic
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
or maybe just one giant penis
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
that was quick
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Right, here we are back in good ol'
temple.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Well, you don't run into any more bugs
on the way back.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
we didnt even meet another giant
centipede
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Also, not really quick.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's been about an hour.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You guys had a bit of a tromp through
the woods getting back, and Phil gave you more food.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
He likes feeding people.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Tekton! We're back."
|
|
Tekton:
|
"wait did you guys leave"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
tekton ezra is two levels higher thatn
you
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"did you feed the duck"
|
|
|
Tekton:
|
"what duck"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
how does it feel to be inferior
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"you were meant to oh god"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"That one!"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"There."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
its his coffin now
|
|
|
Tekton:
|
"oh"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
good bye jikai
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
hello zombie jikai
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
does this mean we can have duck soup
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
make him a vampire
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
whats tekton up to anyway
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Not much, really.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
He's still trying to get accustomed to
his new body.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Also trying to figure out some of the
tech in the temple.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
lets teach him how to fly
|
|
The Drufle:
|
I mean, someone has to run maintenance.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I'll show him where we're going.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"This little island here."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
He nods and starts tapping things on
the display.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You feel the temple begin to shake,
and it begins lifting once more.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Hey."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"I touch the screen."
|
* Bernard Blackbrass makes no move against
them.
|
|
Ezra:
|
let the plant guy be our pilot itll be
great
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Tekton doesn't seem to notice that
anyone said anything.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Now that we're clear, let's rest.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"...uh..."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
castle in the skyyy
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Yeah, if you'd like we can have the
party take a break before they land.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Tekton...?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I would like my ki back, and Hina is
lacking some HPs.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
If you'd like an extended rest.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i need some zombo spells pls
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Don't forget the bugs there
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, sleepy time for all?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
yes
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
how about irl
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
yesh
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Oh, do you want to end the session?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
im not even tired
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oh then let's
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
keep going
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
lets -never- stop
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
eheheheh
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
yes
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
merge with the computer
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
overmind
|
|
The Drufle:
|
I'm surprised Streak hasn't just
fallen asleep on his keyboard.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
eh i don't have things to do right now
so i've been up late all week
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Hey Hina!"
|
* Bernard Blackbrass holds out the deck.
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Pick a card! Any card!"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
nononononon
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"
"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
oh actually satona i gave you a
longsword last time
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
it summons paladins
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Oh, you gave her the holy avenger?
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
wait
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oh cool i can bestow curses now
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
well i don't have much use for it
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
does it actually summon paladins
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
well just one i think
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
literally paladins???
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
goddamnit I have like 72 weapons
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The sword turns into a paladin.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Who will murder stuff.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
can i dump all my spare weapons on him
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Hina wields a Sword with turns into
ANOTHER HINA
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
because i ran out of space for weapons 
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Well, he doesn't last very long.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
well
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
sometimes
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
one hina isn't enough
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
you need someone else that routinely
deals double digit damage
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The paladin only lasts 30 minutes.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
man thats longer than i thought
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Now that's overkill
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
i'll add it to my sheet. . . somewhere
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
but
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
what am I going to do with all these
swords
|
* Bernard Blackbrass holds out the deck,
grinning gleefully.
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
(the naginata counts as a sword on a
stick(
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
if you're concerned about weight you
can leave it here or in my dojo
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
weapons i mean
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oop
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
the comment got added to the url
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, I think Brass wants Hina to draw a
card.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"I'd rather not."
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
Ezra: a dojo seems like a better place
to leave weapons than a temple
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Remember only I can get you access to
them.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
true
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
But then the temple is usually further
than I am
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Keep it in here."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
oops
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
"Very well."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Anything else?
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
nah
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
so is hina the only one that isn' too
evil to use the paladin sord
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
well, we can technically use it, we'd
just rather not
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
also its a longsword and im a ninja
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
i summon the paladin
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
and the paladin begins slaughtering
the party
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
he follows your commands if it doesn't
oppose his alignment, i think
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
so he can't kill baby cops
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
ah
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
he'd totally attack us if you made him
though
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
I'll keep that in mind
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
wait are we still going session wise
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
are we there yet
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You were over Oedipia quite a while
ago, actually.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You were just hovering for a while to
get the extended rest.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Land us, Tekton!"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
THUD
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's less of a thud and more of a
whoosh.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
BONG
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The ground outside must be quite
compressive, given how little of an impact there was.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, everyone outside?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
yes
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
aw i wanna build those zombies
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
next week then
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
well DO IT
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
too much work
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
whats it take like 3 rounds
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
GO GO GO
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
too late we're teleporting away
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i mean the statting
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
good bye
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
jikai
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
so green
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
this green
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Yes, this ground is actually normal
grass!
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's very, very soft.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Kind of like velvet.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
was the last grass not grass
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, not actually normal grass.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
No, that was grass too.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
This grass is spongy.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"This feels weird."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
What's around us?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
pubic grass
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
calling it now
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It isn't curled!
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's actually kinda prickly.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Quite a thing, it is.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Anyway, anyone who isn't totally taken
in by the crazy grass sees a river to the northeast.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Past the river, you think there is a
structure of some sort.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
it's a semen river
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
"Do you see that?"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
calling it now
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
tentacle monsters
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Perception Check
|
At-Will • Wis
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Perception + WisBonus = 1 + 2 + 3 = 6 »
|
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Our destination, no doubt."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It really is water, though.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Kinda transparent, though.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
In fact, everything about this place
seems normal, and yet...
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Not quite right.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
all water is transparent??
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Everything is just slightly different
than what you're used to, and it's kind of getting to you.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
is it just really clean
|
|
The Drufle:
|
No, this water is really, really
transparent.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It's also rather pale.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Also: the river is quite wide.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I move this way.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
sperm water
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
speeeeerm water
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I try to find a thinner part.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The river is a bit thinner up north.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Still quite a ways.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Hmm.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I can run over this.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You can do that.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Sadly no one else can't.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
jesus boots
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
(actual terraria item)
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
(may or may not be called jesus boots)
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
let's use a tekton boat
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
water wading boots!
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, how do you get across, hm?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
or something
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
bring the cart
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
that fucking super magic cart
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
cut down tektons until we have a boat
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I run at full speed over the surface
of the water, each step barely touching the surface.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
yeah don't we have a magic cart
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
and stone horses
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Such a point to make.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
I had some rope
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, who wants to go get it?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I take a little look around.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
50 feet of it
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I think I should get to bed.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
There is a forest in front of you,
Ezra.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
ok
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
we could probably stop now
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
pubic forest
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
You guys seem to be set on whatever.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
full of crabs
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Should we stop now?
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Leave the meeting to next time?
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I suppose i'll follow you
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
yes then we can pretend i brought the
beetle bros
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
and flew over
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
they can fucking fly
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
We have two of them as well
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
yes
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
they could bring everyone
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
but holy fuck stop making penis forest
jokes and get on with it.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
we can beetle race
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
no more jokes
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i thought you were asleep
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, continue or not?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
thats no, more jokes
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
No, no I was... not.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Let's stop for now.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
whats going on with my maptool
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Seems the best way.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Oh hell no.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
We are going right in.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
What with the beetles and all that.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
DIVE, DIVE, DIVE
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
let's stop once we see freudicon
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
oh um okay
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Alright, sure.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
See that?
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Are you just going to swim across the
river?
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Why can't I.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
I'll need a swim check.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Are there things in the water?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
water walk is a 3rd level spel
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
l
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
HA
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
its made of eels
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
what, okay.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
There is, in fact, a current.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i can be jesus right now
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
We'd be able to see if there were any
monsters in it, I think
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
too bad i didnt prepare it
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Yes, there are no monsters in the
water.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
But you can't just wade across.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You'd need a swim check.
|
* Brass rolls: 1d20+5 => 16 + 5 = 21
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i use summons monster that summons a
whatever
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
But first
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I jump it.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i bet that can work
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Could I perhaps anchor a rope
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I am on the other side after all
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I do have some rope, actually.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
i can summon 1d3 dolphins with summons
monster II
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
evil hell dolphins
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Nope I take a running start with my 40
foot movement rate
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
and then swim.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Well, you succeeded your swim check.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So you can make it across.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Swim Check
|
At-Will • Str (2 x Armor Check Penalty)
Roll:
(GM Only) « d20 +
Swim + StrBonus + (2*ArmorCheckPenalty) = 5 + 0 + 1 + 2 * -3
= 0 »
|
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"You look wet."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
hahahahahaha
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
no really im gonna do it
|
* Golurk rolls: 1d3 => 2
|
The Drufle:
|
Seishi kind of... uh... sinks.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
there
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
two dolphins
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Oh, dolphins?
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Roll handle animal.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
hina would rock that roll
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Well, you're getting one too, right?
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
|
Handle Animal Check
|
At-Will • Cha
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ HandleAnimal + ChaBonus = 3 + 0 + 0 = 3 »
|
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Handle Animal Check
|
At-Will • Cha
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ HandleAnimal + ChaBonus = 6 + 0 + 4 = 10 »
|
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Oh, that is not correct.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
the dolphin gropes me
|
* The Drufle rolls: d20+8 => 17 + 8 = 25
|
The Drufle:
|
Hina makes it fine.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Seishi, however, seems to be having
some issues making the dolphin listen.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Ooo, dolphins."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"CAW CAW it's just a few feet"
|
* Bernard Blackbrass adds the dolphin to the
collective.
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Hell dolphins are the *blub* worst"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Maybe the other dolphin can help.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Both of them.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
If someone else can roll handle
animal, you can help get her across.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
That's not how it works.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I'm not trained so, I can't.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"I hate animals!"
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
However, I am going to try Diplomacy.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Hina could go back over and help.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
take 10
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
If... one of them responds ever.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
-Do you know dolphin?-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I make dolphin sounds in my head.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Linguistics Check
|
At-Will • Int
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Linguistics + IntBonus = 1 + 8 + 1 = 10 »
|
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Seishi does not know dolphin.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
She can try another handle animal if
she'd like.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
this is silly
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Hey dolphin.-
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
take 10!
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
or 20
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-Click click bloody click click-
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
-do the eehhh sound they do.-
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You can take 10 if you're trained.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
-That's probably like, punctuation,
for them.-
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
-That's racially insensitive.-
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Is Seishi trained in handle animal?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
no
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
actually
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Wow.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Try diplomacy if not.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
|
Diplomacy Check
|
At-Will • Cha
Roll: (GM Only) « d20
+ Diplomacy + ChaBonus = 7 + 4 + 4 = 15 »
|
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
I am so glad you aren't our combat
summoner.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
hina is!
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
No not diplomacy
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
didn't you summon this thing
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
she doesn't have her mount though
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
she is supposed to have a cool samurai
banner
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
i'm just using it in lieu of Wild
Empathy
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
because I have telepathy.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
she could probably make one out of her
swords
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
actually can't you use the gemsteeds?
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
dont i get a bonus because i summoned
it
|
|
The Drufle:
|
And that check actually passes.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So I'm not going to have the dolphin
kick you into the water.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
all right! plot!
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Four very great methods for crossing
a river."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"CAW the hell up."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
So, this forest is incredibly dense.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"Let's go through this spoopy forest."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The trees are rather thick, and there
isn't much space between them.
|
* Bernard Blackbrass gets out his Nice Axe.
* Bernard Blackbrass just gets to chopping.
* Bernard Blackbrass doesn't give a fuck.
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Maybe we can go around."
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
the forest literally ends here
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"The forest literally ends here."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Yeah, the forest isn't particularly
large.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Everything feels...off."
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Don't care anymore. Chopping down wood.
|
|
|
Bernard Blackbrass:
|
Gonna take this wood.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Off to the east, around the forest,
you see the structure from earlier.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"This place looks like The First World
almost."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
I head towards the structure.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
who's joining me
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It is incredibly large, and made of a
smooth stone.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"This should be his place, then."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"No one else lives here, I'm sure."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Door is up front.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Let's uh...knock."
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You don't have to.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The door is actually open!
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
this doesnt look phallic at all
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
what the hell
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
CHAAAAAAARGE
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Wide open?
|
|
The Drufle:
|
There are double doors at the front.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Hello?"
|
|
The Drufle:
|
And they are totally open.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You hear nothing.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
However, this hallway is incredibly
long.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"..."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Are we going inside?"
|
|
The Drufle:
|
If you'd like to.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
The hallway is mostly empty, aside
from paintings and books strewn around.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Helloooo?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
ezra, the best ninja
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You hear nothing.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
just...yelling
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It is eerily silent.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
SUDDENLY TENTACELS
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
honestly i would actually appreciate
compant
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
company*
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
do i have to drag you in here
|
|
The Drufle:
|
EVERYONE GOES IN
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Really though, you don't hear anything
back here.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
to the end then
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
whats at the end
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
is it gold
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
KEEP GOING
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i think golurk is lagging
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Probably, yes.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
and sneaky is half asleep likely
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Anyway, at the end of the hallway is
another double door!
|
|
The Drufle:
|
It is closed though.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
*knock knock*
|
|
The Drufle:
|
"WHY ARE PEOPLE HERE"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"HI"
|
|
The Drufle:
|
You suddenly hear frantic shouting
from inside.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"UM."
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Ezra looks over to Hina, slightly
confused.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
"OPEN THE DOOR PEOPLES IM BUSY"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
super lag
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
*push*
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
test test
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
am i back
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
yes
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oh thank god
|
|
The Drufle:
|
As you open the doors, you see a
scraggly old man running about.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
freudicon looks exactly like what i
imagined him as
|
|
The Drufle:
|
He's running back and forth from desk
to desk, frantically grabbing up papers and putting them other
places.
|
|
The Drufle:
|
There are... unusual drawings on most
of them.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
oh
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
OH
|
|
The Drufle:
|
He stares at the party that is now in
the room.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
um
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"Um, hello, sir."
|
|
Freudicon:
|
"WHO ARE YOU WHAT DO YOU WANT"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
freudicon is a doujinshi artist
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"My name is Ezra, we seek your
knowledge!"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
clearly
|
|
|
Freudicon:
|
"I AM BUSY WHO SENT YOU"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"We sent us!"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"CAW CAW"
|
|
|
Freudicon:
|
"BIRD"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
that is all i have to say in this
matter
|
|
|
Freudicon:
|
"WHY IS BIRD"
|
|
|
Freudicon:
|
"WHY"
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
"WHAT ARE THESE DRAWINGS"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
"That's Tengu language I think."
|
|
|
Freudicon:
|
"Oh am I really shouting that loudly
sorry I can't hear myself too well why are you here again?"
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Oh god, I can see this conversation
taking hours.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
literally hours
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Let's not continue this.
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
let's get started
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
i mean, sneaky is already dead
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Or I won't get to sleep.
|
|
|
Hina Takahashi:
|
CEASE AND DESIST
|
|
|
Seishi Honekawa:
|
TESTIMONY BEGIN
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
Listen, Freud, could you wait like a
week?
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
we have this kind of double life thing
going on
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Seriously though, I am really tired.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
its pretty complicated
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Let's end this thing now.
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
we'll be back mr freud
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Next time: FREUDICON
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
the mystery of the secrets
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
revealed???
|
|
|
Ezra:
|
(do the duck thing)
|
|
The Drufle:
|
Now, everyone out.
|
|
Jikai:
|
HAI
|
|
|
Jikai:
|
JIKAI
|
|
|
Jikai:
|
ADVENTURE ON PENIS ISLAND
|
|
|
Jikai:
|
WILL SOMEONE END UP MARRYING FREUD-SAMA
|
|
|
Jikai:
|
STAY TUNED
|
